Soulmates Beyond Marriage: My Ever-Deepening Love With Spiritsong

October 14, 2016 | By | 4 Replies Read More
Benjamin Bernstein and Spiritsong

Publicity photo of Spiritsong and me from our days as a singer/songwriter duo

Note: This is a “spin-off” post from my recent article, “My Bisexuality and Polyamory Astrologized.” This article will be more meaningful if you read the other one first. Spiritsong read and approved this post.

An enduring unconditional love can be experienced between two people, even more deeply, after a romantic partnership ends. This has been the case with me and Spiritsong, who was my fourth wife. We were romantic partners for our first seven years, but have shared an intertwined life journey for almost 13 years. We’ve enjoyed a harmonious, mutually supportive and deeply loving relationship both during and after our marriage.

Like me, Spiritsong is a professional astrologer and healing facilitator. Many will remember the This Week in Astrology podcasts she co-hosted with me, or perhaps went to one of the Asheville-area singer/songwriter gigs where we sang together.

Spiritsong lovingly and powerfully embodies all the Uranus/Aquarius catalyzing energies I mentioned in my bisexuality/polyamory article. Under her angelic influence, my many rough edges started getting smoothed out. My personal and spiritual growth went into high gear during our seven years as a couple.

Spiritsong is very psychically sensitive. Although I was honoring our commitment to physical monogamy, she could occasionally feel my inner restlessness and desire for sexual connection with others. Each time she checked in with me about this, I was honest about what I was feeling. I loved Spiritsong profoundly, but also felt that I wanted more than one love.

We were still undecided about our future status as a couple when, one day, she surprised me. She drove me to a part of the forest that was special to her. In that sacred place, in an extraordinary act of unconditional love, she offered to release me from our marriage bonds. She said that she loved me with all her heart and wished that we could stay together. But it was more important to set me free so I could explore my polyamorous desires.

I accepted her release with both gratitude and sorrow. It wasn’t easy to walk away from what was, hands down, the best relationship I’d ever had. As we went through the process of separating during the following months, many who saw us together couldn’t believe we were getting ready to divorce. They felt so much love between us, they said, that we felt more like a couple who were about to get married!

In the years since our divorce, Spiritsong and I have remained best friends. We understand that we have a profound soul connection, and support each other any way we can. Our love has continued deepening steadily, even as we’ve moved in and out of relationships with others.

Many people think of love as conditional and limited. If you have a romantic partner, you’re not supposed to love anyone else. Such is human, egoic love, which can be granted or withheld based on mood or circumstance.

But from a higher perspective, love is all there is. Even if you choose monogamy, you can still open your heart to all other beings and everything else that exists. In doing this, you spontaneously merge with what you thought was “other” … only to discover that it was you all along! There is only God, which amuses itself by pretending to be separate manifestations. This nondual awareness is the essence of spiritual awakening.

Polyamory means “many loves,” and is usually taken in a sexual context. But the bond Spiritsong and I share might be called “platonic polyamory.” We stand as an example of how an enduring unconditional love can be experienced between two people, even more deeply, after a romantic partnership ends.

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Category: Practical Spirituality

As an “AstroShaman,” Benjamin Bernstein offers the soul-level insights of astrology, the healing power of shamanism and the ongoing support of life coaching. Benjamin hosts This Week in Astrology, a Top 10 Astrology Podcast Award winner, and was voted Western North Carolina's best astrologer three years in a row. After doing over 7000 sessions, Benjamin has fine-tuned his ability to help you master challenge, embrace transformation and enjoy a more wonderful life. Satisfaction guaranteed, or it’s free!

Comments (4)

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  1. Allahna says:

    I love the evolution of your relationship/spirit partnership with Spiriting and pray for your continued unfoldment.
    I pray that I may awaken in that same direction!
    Ilona Ireland

  2. Maggie Wickstrom says:

    I admire you for many reasons. You exude love and compassion. I appreciate and learn from everything you share. I appreciate you sharing your coming out. Sharing like that leads the way for others. If we all could be so aware and open the world would overflow with love. For years, because of physical and emotional pain, I somewhat shut down and closed myself off from the world. I am back on track now and opening myself up. Thank you for all of your information and insight. It really does make a difference.

  3. Susie says:

    Thank you for your open and honest article. It just confirms to me that relationships are changing, and reflecting the continuous progression of unfoldment. Thank you?

  4. Alecs says:

    So glad you finally got that load off your chest, Benjamin!!!

    Personally it means that I can start trusting you more fully, as before there was something a-miss.

    Notwithstanding how professional, well-informed, well-studied, well-spoken, helpful, patient, honest and mind-transforming you and the sessions I had with you were, a small part of me sensed a withholding of personal information which, of course, was none of my business but that, in any case, created a sort of road block.

    I believe that whenever someone is not living as their true self there is a gap in any communication, however small and imperceptible, that eludes full understanding between people.

    Knowing how important it is for you to share your message with the world, I do believe that you will now be an even better communicator than before!

    Go get them!

    Love, always,
    And thanks for sharing too :-)

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