Being motivated isn’t usually a problem for me. The 10th house of my astrology chart may be empty, but most of my personal planets are in accomplishment-oriented Earth signs and houses. My challenge is usually tearing myself away from work!
But that wasn’t the case the past two weeks. After two successive weekends of powerful shamanic ceremonies, I found myself in an unusual state, lethargic and unmotivated day after day.
Not that I was suffering. On the contrary, I was abiding in a significantly deeper state of bliss and ecstasy than ever before. My shamanic ceremonies catapulted me into a new level of divine consciousness, which I needed time to integrate into physical plane functionality.
Normally I’m able to take a rest day after ceremony, then slip back into my usual get-‘er-done groove as new states integrate. But this was a much bigger shift than most, and it needed me to chill out and do less. The universe even encouraged me with an uncharacteristically empty calendar: suddenly there were far fewer clients scheduling sessions!
I felt some concern over this sudden drop in business, but was also aware of the yin phase the universe needed me to embrace. I spent more time in nature, and indulged myself with more Netflix, pleasure reading and group activities than usual. I finally felt my mojo returning a couple of days ago, and feel back at the top of my game as I write this.
More Challenging Integrations
I didn’t always have such blissful integrations. In my early years working with ayahuasca and San Pedro plant spirit medicines, I had massive amounts of hucha — dense, heavy energy — come up for clearing.
A huge amount of this psychic sludge would clear during ceremonies, but more would get triggered in my daily life afterward. Integration back then might include waves of anger, sadness, grief, anxiety and other unpleasant emotions.
After dozens of plant spirit ceremonies and 11 years of intense self-work, I now get to enjoy more pleasant integration periods after a consciousness upgrade. I’m so glad I stayed the course when the hucha was thicker and the path muddier!
A lot of people are clearing a lot of heavy energy these days. You might be too, even if you haven’t adopted my gung-ho strategy of doing shamanic ceremonies and holotropic-influenced breathwork to meet your hucha head-on.
You might be slogging through a swamp full of challenging emotions and toxic habits. Or you might just be wondering where your motivation and zest for life went. Either way, it might be wise to cut yourself some slack and take it as easy as you can. A lot of your energy may be needed for subtle internal work … energetic clearings and upgrades you might not even be aware of!
It’s good to have quick, simple and effective techniques ready that you can use on the spot when challenging emotions come up. Many have found my free Healing Invocation helpful. Or you may have something else that’s effective. I and many others have found that asking for healing from the divine, then stepping aside while this far more capable part takes care of business, is more effective than ego-directed methods.
Don’t think you’re alone if you’re experiencing something like what I’ve described here. Everyone and everything is being called to awaken during this extraordinary time of universal consciousness upgrade. And you do have to feel it to heal it.
If you don’t clear your hucha, it’ll keep erupting again and again until you do. The good news is that every layer of the onion you peel will leave you more full of ease, flow and grace. At the onion’s core is the light of a thousand suns, pure ecstatic beingness, shining through more powerfully with each layer you peel. Whatever it takes to peel those layers, I believe it’s worth it!